Being a Bumble Bee

I knew it would be difficult, time-consuming and all about the details but I never knew it could be THIS tough! =(

It is not only tough. It is a nightmare. It is pure madness! Looking at alien codes, going back and forth between designs and layouts, excreting my barely-there creative juices for everything that is absolutely necessary and forgoing my beauty sleep.

The days are spent on that oh-so important job hunt - I surf the usual sites, type my usual cover letters, click the 'send' button on a regular basis, and attend an interview if I am lucky. "Can the market really be that bad or is it just me?", I begin to wonder.

The evenings and through the nights are spent on twigging the necessary. After two late nights of sleeping at 4 and 6 in the morning, it seems to be slowly coming together. Given the amount of time and effort needed, I question why others do it, or more accurately, how they did it. Then again, I am doing it alone - so that easily doubles (or even triples) the workload for me.

Even as I plough on with all my might, I am clueless as to how I would eventually pull everything together, if even at all. I have a vision in mind, the feasibility of which I am unsure. I have a passion in me, which whether it could ever turn into something big, I too am unsure. I will take my baby steps one at a time and see where the road leads me.